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New York Times

Sat, 03 Jun 2023 09:51:20 GMT

Check out this important New York Times article:

“Want to Fix Your Mind, Let Your Body Talk.”

Trauma Statistics

Sat, 03 Jun 2023 09:30:56 GMT

You’re Not Alone: Numbers Do Mean Something

The only clear and concise data available concerning the number of individuals within the U.S. who have been sexually abused is … there is no clear and concise data. The numbers vary between which ever agency is doing the reporting. Research conducted by the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) and published by the U.S. Department of Justice indicates 1 out of every 4 girls (25%) experience some form of sexual assault before the age of 18 including rape, and 1 out of every 6 boys (17%). There is an estimated 8.5M girls who have experienced some form of sexual abuse. 91% of childhood sexual abuse is committed by someone known or trusted by the child: 1 out of every 4 girls, and 1 out of every 13 boys.

With that said, all reporting agencies do state that only 30% of assaults are actually reported. That leaves 70% undisclosed. So what does this look like exactly?

It appears staggering. Let’s break it down. If you’re sitting at a table of 4 girls, that means at least one within in that group has or is experiencing sexual abuse. Guys? … at least one out of every 6 has either been assaulted or is currently experiencing assault.

If we extend these numbers out into the general populous then we can seemingly estimate that 21% of the U.S. population suffers from some form of emotional/mental trauma stemming from sexual abuse. There are some experts who claim the numbers are even higher.

U.S. Population to Estimated 334,583,015 as of 04/2023 (1).

Let's Be Frank

Long-Term Health Consequence
Traumatic experiences in childhood have been linked to increased medical conditions throughout the individuals’ lives. The Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study is a longitudinal study that explores the long-lasting impact of childhood trauma into adulthood.

Economic Impact
The cumulative economic and social burden of complex trauma in childhood is extremely high. Based upon data from a variety of sources, a conservative annual cost of child abuse and neglect is an estimated $103.8 billion, or $284.3 million per day (in 2007 values) (2) .

In 2013, the U.S Bureau of Census’ Projected Population for Los Angeles County is just over 10 Million (3) .

The economic impact of child sexual abuse in Los Angeles County will run approximately $9,300,000,000 (4) .

References

1. US Census Bureau
2. National Child Traumatic Stress Network
3. US Census Bureau – Los Angeles County
4. Darkness to Light

The Dynamic Life

Thu, 19 Feb 2015 22:49:05 GMT

Tools To Construct A Dynamic Life

The dynamic life will be the life you choose to operate and there is no individual outside of yourself who can predict what it will look like. Once a person has moved through the process of healing and recapitulation there are however, well-defined characteristics which do become apparent:

Your sense of Self and Value will no longer be attached to exterior influences such as people, places, things or situations.
The feeling of being “less-than”; self-questioning and doubt will dissipate.
The need for arrogance and grandiosity to manipulate and gain self appreciation will cease.
An esteemed and well-balanced sense of self (character) is experienced.
Functional and Respectful Boundaries are learned, established and maintained.
Awareness and Respect for one’s own Reality (the body; thinking; feelings and behavior) is experienced and expressed appropriately.
The ability to Understand, Acknowledge and Meet ones own Needs and becoming Interdependent with Others is gained.
Clarity of mind and perception will allow one to focus on specific goals no longer wasting time and energy on self-doubting thoughts and ideas.
Trusting oneself for care and protection will gain courage and faith in the future.
Emotional Intelligence (understanding how to direct ones feelings) is gained.

The Healing Process

Mon, 02 Feb 2015 16:33:48 GMT

Offender's Corner

Thu, 22 Jan 2015 23:14:22 GMT

Only Through Admission Can Someone Recover

In many ways Paraphilia is no different from any other addiction/obsessive compulsive behavior. Paraphiliac disorders control a person’s thoughts and actions, they are recurrent, intense, sexually arousing fantasies, urges, or behaviors that are distressing or disabling. They involve inanimate objects, children or non-consenting adults, suffering or humiliation of oneself or the partner with the probability of causing harm. It leaves a trail of damage behind that carries exorbitant fiscal costs locally and nationally. Like all disorders/addictions, a person must come to a state that literally places them in such physical or emotional jeopardy that he or she is willing to admit they have a problem. It is only through this admission that anyone can begin to experience hope of recovery.

Here are a couple of links to informative articles titled The Truth About Sex Offending and Can Sex Offenders Recover ? I encourage you to read and educate yourself as much as possible then follow through with a phone call to a local chapter of SA, SAA, SCA, SLAA, and SRA for support. There is a Sexual Behavior Clinic at The Royal Ottawa Mental Health Care Center that has demonstrated much success working with those who suffer from this disorder.

Additional Links to Medical Articles/Studies:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK554425/

https://www.merckmanuals.com/professional/psychiatric-disorders/paraphilic-disorders/overview-of-paraphilic-disorders

“There is no shame in recovery, only in the choice to ignore it."

-Deborah Thompson Cox, SEP

When a Child Comes To You

Tue, 20 Jan 2015 16:20:19 GMT

You Are Their Advocate

Few of us expect much less anticipate a child approaching us and disclosing he/she is being sexually abused. We must remember that most children simply don’t have the language to describe what is happening to them and they are heavily burdened by a deep sense of guilt, shame and fear. These are three extremely powerful feelings that have been instilled in them by the perpetrator in attempt to gain the child’s silence and protection. For a child to move beyond them is a show of great courage and trust. This trust must never be ignored, invalidated, excused or questioned.

When a child comes to you, YOU automatically become the child’s advocate. It is your responsibility to listen, gather as much information regarding who, what, when, where and how and then report the incident to law enforcement or child protective services or visit the National Children’s Alliance at www.nationalchildrensalliance.org or call 1.800.239.9950. Listed below are a few guidelines as published by D2L.org a child advocacy organization dedicated to educating the public regarding this issue:

Know

Know the signs of abuse (physical & emotional) to protect children from further harm. Detail of signs listed online at D2L.org .

Understand

Understand how to respond to risky behaviors and suspicions or reports of abuse. There are 3 reasons we need to react to sexual abuse:

A child discloses it to us
We discover it ourselves
We have reason to suspect it

Disclosure

A child has broken through secrecy, fear and shame and has chosen you as the person he or she trusts enough to tell. Honor that with attention, compassion and belief.

Listen calmly and openly
Don’t fill in the gaps, or rush to “get to the bottom of it”
Don’t ask leading questions about details
Ask only open ended questions like, “What happened next?” or say, “It’s OK to tell me more.”

Remember, few reported incidents are false. It is NOT your responsibility to make this determination.

Discovery

You’ve witnessed a sexually abusive act by an adult or youth with a child or you know by some other way that abuse has taken place. For example, a friend or coworker may have told you something definitive.

Report

Report immediately to local law enforcement; child protective services or contact National Children’s Alliance or call 1.800.239.9950.

Tell the child’s name and where the child lives
Tell the facts. This may include what the child has told, or behaviors from the alleged offender that you saw.
Tell what signs you’ve seen in the child
Tell what access the alleged offender has to the child

Suspicion

People who offend are rarely seen in the act of sexually abusing a child, but they are often seen breaking rules and pressing boundaries.

Bystander Intervention

A bystander is a person who witnesses a boundary violation or sees a situation in which a child is vulnerable.
Describe the inappropriate behavior or the boundary violation to the person who has crossed it. “It looks like you’re forcing Chloe to kiss and hug. She looks uncomfortable.”
Set a limit with the person who has crossed the boundary. “Please stop. We let Chloe decide who she wants to show affection to.”
Move on: “Chloe, let’s go see what the other children are up to.”

If there is a pattern of boundary violations or you’ve intervened and boundary violations continue, you may have reasonable suspicion.

Make a report to the police or child protective services.

Education & Awareness

Wed, 07 Jan 2015 13:57:40 GMT

Be Proactive in Your Healing Process

Two important aspects of any healing process is education and developing self-awareness. What is Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and how does it relate to childhood abuse? What are the common symptoms and how do they affect our minds and bodies? What are some techniques used to either lessen or heal the core injury? These are just a few of the questions we answer while working through this process.

How do we educate and develop awareness? We read, we ask questions, we sit with our peers and share our experience, strength and hope. All of this begins the process of clearing away that foggy sense of guilt, shame and remorse. We discover direct relationships between the abuse that occurred to us as children and how it now affects the way we interpret our environment and relationships as adults. This is a proactive process of self-discovery.